Who will be the Angry Young Man of Indian politics?

India vs Bharat. It’s a political slogan but it’s truer than ever before. We must accept there are two Indias.

Just think. 

The only time I travel by train or bus is when I am in Kerala. 

When I need grocery or vegetables I book online. 

Most of us middle class rarely get to see Bharat or know its share of problems. 

The only time we do that is when we take an Uber or Ola cab and strike a conversation with the driver. Or when there is whitewash or construction work on at home. 

When such an opportunity presented itself recently, I decided to take up the most pressing issue these days. 

Why are Pushpa and KGF super-duper hits when Hindi films are tanking at the box office?

The cab driver was very clear. “Hindi films bekaar ho gaye hain. Dekho to south ke films dekho.”

He then gave me a tip, “If you happen to be down, just watch Pushpa or KGF. It will lift your mood.”

“Why not RRR,” I asked. 

“RRR bakwas hai, aap Pushpa aur KGF dekho.”

As I got out of the cab, he said, “Pushpa Part 2 will be better. Some new villain has come His name is Shekhawat. But Pushpa is a proud man. I fear he will die in the next part.”

The painters at my house concurred with the cab driver.

I acted on their advice and watched Pushpa and RRR and bits of KGF.

Pushpa is a kolamass film. So is KGF. Both have punch dialogues and action.

Now RRR is tricky. RRR is a patriotic film that ends with the protagonists becoming Ram and Bheem to finish off the British colonizers. Of the three films this one has better special effects. It is a raging hit among the middle class. Then why were the cab driver, carpenters and painters gushing over Pushpa and KGF more than RRR?

This became a hot topic in our weekend drinking session. 

After three large pegs, we started to see light. 

“Many Hindi films that have released over the last few months have also been patriotic films and turned out to be duds,” pointed out one. 

“We are being fed patriotism round the clock on news TV free of cost.  After this we are expected to pay to see more patriotism in the theatres,” explained another, “We want to forget our worries and enjoy a bit. Pushpa and KGF do that.” 

“There is more to Pushpa and KGF,” the wise one among the drinkers theorised, “Heroes in both films are taking on the establishment. They are the Angry Young Men of today.”

He then down another double large and extrapolated further, “There is anger in society. The question is who will channelize it.”

We then downed a couple more pegs and moved on to weightier issues like legalizing cannabis.  

Shane Warne – the Spinner With Hunter’s Instincts

(This is entirely written from memory, excuse the masala if any)

He would zero in on the prey slowly, patiently, stealthily, before delivering the killer blow at the least expected moment. Shane Warne was a spinner with hunter’s instincts.  

His dismissal of Sachin Tendulkar in a Test in Australia best illustrates the description. Delivery after delivery, he pitched leg breaks on the middle stump or off stump. Tendulkar would go on the front foot and leave it, watching the ball turn away from him safely.  Warne kept at it, it seemed, forever. Tendulkar did the same.  The cat and mouse game went on for some time. And then Warne bowled a flipper. It pitched on the middle stump and went straight. Tendulkar once again left the ball, expecting a leg break, only to be caught LBW.

Warne was a natural at mind games.

Last ball of the day. Pakistan’s Basit Ali at the crease. Warne calls the captain, changes the field, shuffles the players around. Quite pointless it would seem given that it is the last ball of the day. Basit only has one thing to do – that is not get out. Warne is about to start, but stops. He decides to bowl round the wicket. Again quite pointless given that it is the last ball of the day. And Basit decides to do what he has to do – come what may, don’t get out. In his mind, Basit has decided he will block the ball with his legs. He can’t get out LBW to a ball pitched outside the leg stump. He can’t get out giving a catch if he blocking the ball with his leg. Very simple, very logical, very clever, very doable. Warne comes, bowls into the rough patch, Basit moves his left leg but suspects it is not in line with the ball, so moves his leg again, in the meantime the ball has gone through his legs and hit the stumps.

That was Warne.

Watching him play, you felt the same excitement you got watching Malcom Marshall, Michael Holding, Curtly Ambrose, Wasim Akram, Waqar Younis, Dennis Lillee…. Warne was a spinner with fast bowler’s aggression.

When Warne is on the field, there is fear among the rivals, and expectancy among fans, that something is about to happen.

1999 - the World Cup Australia came back from behind to win. Some of the credit goes Warne’s inspiring pep talks. We saw flashes of that brilliant mind in the first IPL, when he led a mediocre Rajasthan Royals to a title win.

Shane Warne was the best captain Australia never had.

Everyone knows about the ball of the century. No need to retell that story. I don’t know about Gatting, but even now fans like us have not come to terms with that dismissal. How can one bowl over the wicket, hit the pitch outside the leg stump, and turn the ball enough to clip the bail on the offstump? That is perfection measured in nanometers. One degree lesser turn, the ball hits the bat, one degree more, it misses the stump. You can calculate the angle and height of the delivery with scale and protractor for hours but you can’t crack that one mate. Not for nothing was it called the ball of the century.

Warne was a true magician.

KPAC, the name is enough

I don’t know much about KPAC Lalitha except what I have read in the newspapers. 

I haven’t met her or spoken to her over the phone.

I don’t how she prepares for the roles she plays or the process she follows.

What I know is that what we get to see on the screen is brilliantly natural. So natural it seems it’s all happening in front of us in flesh and blood.

The tears, the laughter, the smirk, the mannerisms, everything looks so real.

As I mentioned, I don’t know much about KPAC. Then why should I write about her.

We grew up watching her. If we saw moms and grandmoms in Kaviyoor Ponnamma and Sukumary, KPAC was more an elder sister to us. You felt a warmth in her presence. Oh, the power of cinema!

When she died, we all felt that tinge of pain, like we lost someone close.

I don’t know much about KPAC, but how can I not say good bye to her?

Today in his tribute, Mohanlal mentions KPAC’s (the mother) narration of the tragic death of the heroine’s father at her own hands in the film Sanmanassullavarku Samadhanam. While we ordinary film lovers don’t know the trickery filmmakers play with flashbacks, what we know is we listened to KPAC living that moment, some in tears.

KPAC was a unique talent. If Sachin Tendulkar could play any delivery 10 different ways, KPAC could play the same role in a hundred different ways. That is why we never got bored with her.

If the best actor award went to the best actor instead of best heroes and heroines, KPAC would have won it every year, year after year.

That would seem a little exaggerated, but you get the drift.

Athu thanne.

The mystery of the hijab fight

This week we got to re-learn many things which we thought were things of the past which we needn’t worry about in this age and century. For instance the difference between a hijab, abaya, burqa, etc. These are things we worry about when we go to the Gulf. 

Here in India it never occurred to me to know which is what.

This week we saw teenage girls protesting on campuses to wear the hijab and teenage boys protesting to stop them from wearing it. Just writing that sentence made me laugh.

Headscarves among Muslim students are common in Kerala, and probably in other southern states. We won’t get to know why college authorities in Karnataka, one by one, banned it in classrooms.  We also won’t know why the girls chose to protest so vehemently. But both happened days before elections in Uttar Pradesh so naturally many are adding 2 and 2 to guess what may be the cause.

As a jasoos, one of the best in the business, I am trained to look at things differently. I dig deep to find all the possible reasons for an event before ruling out the impossible ones to settle on the most probable one, howsoever improbable it might sound to you.

The hijab fight in Karnataka is happening for a reason. All this is part of a larger game plan to bridge the North-South divide.

I am sure you all admit this North-South divide is real.

The divide is visible on all parameters - infant mortality rate, population ration, fertility rate, poverty, etc. Now there are three ways of bridging a divide. You can either lift North to South or lift both so that they meet midway or lift South to meet North.

Now lifting North to South’s level is a huge challenge that will take years. Because South didn’t reach where it is doing nothing. In the decades when rulers north of the Vindhyas were ensuring social and financial justice for their families and clans, their southern counterparts were doing all that plus a bit of development.

The other option is easily achievable.

For this you need to keep the citizens busy. Don’t give them a moment to think. Give them a bone every day to fight over.

So when a hijab ban is announced by a college in some corner of the country, a few students will fight to wear it, many will fight to stop them from wearing it, many more will fight to defend the girls, and many many more will fight to defend the boys.

And everyone likes a good fight.

Public intellectuals, who till yesterday lectured Muslim women on how the hijab and burqa are regressive, now tell us they wear it out of choice. To prove their point, a few will start wearing the burqa too, some will start observing karva chauth, some might start wearing the ghoonghat, some will start wearing sindoor and mangalsutra. All this to tell us these are choices they make.

We men wonder what the fuss was all these years.

The response the hijab fight got in Karnataka and other southern states shows the plan is on track.

The Leader is bridging the North-South divide and he is doing a good job of it.

Why does Modi do what he does ?

Every ruler wants to be remembered for something or the other when they die. There never was any selfless work. Those who we remember for ‘nishkaam karma’ fooled us into remembering them for that.

Jawaharlal Nehru is remembered for being the architect of democracy in India. And rightly so.

Most of my student life I spent abusing Nehru – the man who sowed seeds of dynasty. I blamed him for Chinese aggression, Kashmir dispute, price rise, unemployment, poverty, hunger, pretty much everything I didn’t like. I never read much about him, or for that matter anybody or anything, but for me he was a villain.

It took me seven years of Narendra Modi’s rule to realize Nehru’s greatness.

A few months ago I was at a temple festival where my drinking buddies, all of them bhakts, cornered me, telling me how Modi is being victimized by everyone. One versus 10 arguing about Modi’s policies, but still he is the victim.

I said, “All these years I abused Nehru, I could do so freely, no one ever threatened me. I do that now with Modi the chances are I will not escape without a sound thrashing.”

That is why Nehru is the architect of democracy in India. Without him, India could well have become a nut case like Pakistan.

Poor Lal Bahadur Shastri didn’t rule enough to leave a legacy.

India Gandhi will be remembered as the Iron Lady. The Wonder Woman who won a war with Pakistan and split that country into two. The only war since WW2 to have a clear victor.

Rajiv Gandhi, unfortunately, will not be remembered for much. He was dashing and handsome, but that pretty much sums up his term. He was unlucky not to have ruled the country for long to leave a legacy.

Narasimha Rao perhaps would have been happy surviving his full term. But he left a lasting legacy. The man who transformed India. He is the reason I have a decent job in Delhi despite being an utter flop in studies. One could argue there was no escaping liberalization, but had it come 5 or 10 years later, I would have spent my post-college days standing in queues outside the employment exchange.

Atal Bihari Vajpayee wanted to leave a grand legacy. He wanted to solve the Kashmir issue, but didn’t reach anywhere. So did Manmohan Singh, but he too failed after 10 years in power. While they will be remembered for the economic reforms, welfare schemes, nuke test and deals, will they feature in school history textbooks 20 years down the line? Highly unlikely.

Now where does Narendra Modi stand?

Often people ask why Modi does what he does?

To win elections, one might say, but that goes without saying. There is more to what he does.

The PM started by wanting to be a superhero of sports. A leader who got India its rightful place on the global stage. That has got him nowhere.

Like a good batsman, Modi studied the pitch and paced his innings. The construction of the Ram mandir, the removal Article 370 and the possible enactment of a Uniform Civil Code in his remaining term will ensure he is remembered as the architect of the Hindu Rashtra.

Modi’s place is assured in history textbooks in the decades to come.

For good or bad, he is up there with Nehru, Indira and Rao.

But that is not enough. Modi’s dil maange more.

This is where the rebuilding of New Delhi comes into the picture.

The Dilli we have been taught about has many faces – Indraprastha built by the Pandavas, Old Delhi built by the Mughals, New Delhi built by the British. Add to that the Modern Delhi being built by Modi.

Years from now, when my grandkids visit Delhi, the tour guide will tell them, “On your right is the Parliament, this is the central vista where the govt is run from, that is the national war memorial, there is an Amar Jawan Jyothi there in memory of fallen soldiers, look at this Netaji statue, etc etc… All this was built by Narendra Damodardas Modi.”

You may want to forget Modi, but Modi is here to be remembered.