Modi is India, India is Modi

When Narendra Modi speaks in Parliament, which is rare, everyone listens. His fans, his critics, his trolls, pretty much everyone. And he never lets us down.

This week, the PM spoke his mind, wearing a jacket of recycled plastic according to his PR machinery, but evidently the man himself thought it was Teflon. The speech exuded such confidence.

There are two ways I listen to his speech. One, I read between the lines. Two, I do not read between the lines. Then, by now you all know, I employ the good old Sherlock Holmes principle - When you have eliminated all which is impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth. 

So when Modi said, “If Nehru is such a great man, why are his grandkids and great grand kids not using the Nehru surname”, many took it as another attempt to belittle the country’s first prime minister, an intellectual giant, the kind of who we rarely see. But not me. 

I thought and over-thought the remark in my head many times over. I dissected it with scalpel blade 15. And finally came to a conclusion.

Suppose Indira Priyadarshini had retained her father’s surname instead of adding her husband’s after marriage. Suppose Indira’s sons took their mother’s surname instead of their father’s. Too many suppositions, I know, but you must not lose track. Suppose their kids took their surname from their mothers instead of their father. It would have been a tremendous strike at the root of patriarchy coming straight from the First Family of India. Now the Leader’s statement starts making sense. Immense sense.

Not everything Modi said came coded in Greek. Most of it was plainspeak.

He said the UPA converted every opportunity into a scam. Isn’t that true? Even when there was no scam, Manmohan Singh’s partymen told us there is one, to polish the heir apparent’s resume, to present him as the hero who will set all things that are wrong with the UPA right. For some strange reason the heir refused to join the govt and clean up the mess, instead waiting for the elections. The voter had different ideas. 

The most controversial bits in Modi’s speeches came in two parts over two days.

“The country trusts me and not the abuses and accusations you throw at me.”

“Ek akela kitno pe bhaari pad raha hai.”

He is just being truthful.

If hours long queues to take money out of ATM could not unseat him, if thousands of deaths caused by oxygen shortage could not unseat his party in Uttar Pradesh, nothing else will. Definitely not a businessman out to make some quick buck. 

Nor a cross-country yatra to unite the country. For starters, how do you unite a country where the majority feels there are no divisions.

The likes of Mani Shankar Aiyar and Chidambaram and Jairam Ramesh will remind you how JP dethroned Indira and how VP Singh defeated Rajiv Gandhi.

There is a big difference.

Indira made an enemy of every Opposition leader. All of them ganged up with the common aim of toppling her and with personal ambitions of becoming PM.

Her son was no great politician and opposition had the self-belief – if Indira can be defeated, then Rajiv certainly can be.  

Modi has learnt from the mistakes of Indira, Rajiv and Manmohan.

One, don’t give opposition leaders a reason to gang up against him. So he will give Naveen Patnaik, Jagan Reddy, K Chandrasekhar Rao, Akhilesh Yadav, etc their free space at the state level. The opposition is perennially divided.

Two, rule with an iron fist when you have such a brutal majority. Rajiv suffered because VP Singh, right under his nose, turned against him, rather the PM allowed him to.  

Three, never let the public get even a whiff of a scam even if there is one. Ignore charges being leveled by the Opposition unlike Manmohan who would sack ministers and order investigations. Modi has one advantage. The fear factor. From the fourth estate to pretty much every estate, no one dare point a finger at him. 

Modi is bigger than the BJP. Modi is bigger than the RSS. The trouble is he knows it, though his modesty doesn’t let him say so openly.

 “Ek akela kitno pe bhaari pad raha hai.”

When Modi said that, thumping his Chappan Chaathi multiple times, his party colleagues in the ministry and Parliament, stood up to give him an ovation. As they did that, they saw something we didn’t on the TV, thanks to their privileged seats right next to the PM. They spotted the Halo.

To them, and sadly many more outside, Modi is India and India is Modi. 

Ek akela aadmi sab pe bhaari.

Post script : After all, the investors who put money in the group did so, not because India is a land of opportunities, but because of the promoters' proximity to the PM. 

Why does Modi do what he does ?

Every ruler wants to be remembered for something or the other when they die. There never was any selfless work. Those who we remember for ‘nishkaam karma’ fooled us into remembering them for that.

Jawaharlal Nehru is remembered for being the architect of democracy in India. And rightly so.

Most of my student life I spent abusing Nehru – the man who sowed seeds of dynasty. I blamed him for Chinese aggression, Kashmir dispute, price rise, unemployment, poverty, hunger, pretty much everything I didn’t like. I never read much about him, or for that matter anybody or anything, but for me he was a villain.

It took me seven years of Narendra Modi’s rule to realize Nehru’s greatness.

A few months ago I was at a temple festival where my drinking buddies, all of them bhakts, cornered me, telling me how Modi is being victimized by everyone. One versus 10 arguing about Modi’s policies, but still he is the victim.

I said, “All these years I abused Nehru, I could do so freely, no one ever threatened me. I do that now with Modi the chances are I will not escape without a sound thrashing.”

That is why Nehru is the architect of democracy in India. Without him, India could well have become a nut case like Pakistan.

Poor Lal Bahadur Shastri didn’t rule enough to leave a legacy.

India Gandhi will be remembered as the Iron Lady. The Wonder Woman who won a war with Pakistan and split that country into two. The only war since WW2 to have a clear victor.

Rajiv Gandhi, unfortunately, will not be remembered for much. He was dashing and handsome, but that pretty much sums up his term. He was unlucky not to have ruled the country for long to leave a legacy.

Narasimha Rao perhaps would have been happy surviving his full term. But he left a lasting legacy. The man who transformed India. He is the reason I have a decent job in Delhi despite being an utter flop in studies. One could argue there was no escaping liberalization, but had it come 5 or 10 years later, I would have spent my post-college days standing in queues outside the employment exchange.

Atal Bihari Vajpayee wanted to leave a grand legacy. He wanted to solve the Kashmir issue, but didn’t reach anywhere. So did Manmohan Singh, but he too failed after 10 years in power. While they will be remembered for the economic reforms, welfare schemes, nuke test and deals, will they feature in school history textbooks 20 years down the line? Highly unlikely.

Now where does Narendra Modi stand?

Often people ask why Modi does what he does?

To win elections, one might say, but that goes without saying. There is more to what he does.

The PM started by wanting to be a superhero of sports. A leader who got India its rightful place on the global stage. That has got him nowhere.

Like a good batsman, Modi studied the pitch and paced his innings. The construction of the Ram mandir, the removal Article 370 and the possible enactment of a Uniform Civil Code in his remaining term will ensure he is remembered as the architect of the Hindu Rashtra.

Modi’s place is assured in history textbooks in the decades to come.

For good or bad, he is up there with Nehru, Indira and Rao.

But that is not enough. Modi’s dil maange more.

This is where the rebuilding of New Delhi comes into the picture.

The Dilli we have been taught about has many faces – Indraprastha built by the Pandavas, Old Delhi built by the Mughals, New Delhi built by the British. Add to that the Modern Delhi being built by Modi.

Years from now, when my grandkids visit Delhi, the tour guide will tell them, “On your right is the Parliament, this is the central vista where the govt is run from, that is the national war memorial, there is an Amar Jawan Jyothi there in memory of fallen soldiers, look at this Netaji statue, etc etc… All this was built by Narendra Damodardas Modi.”

You may want to forget Modi, but Modi is here to be remembered.

Natasha & Devangana: The Deepti Navals of Activism

This week two student activists ruled the Internet. Natasha Narwal and Devangana Kalita. 

The JNU students, who have been charged under the anti-terror law UAPA, were released on bail Thursday evening from Tihar jail after 13 months of incarceration.

It’s a classic David vs Goliath story.

Two twenty-somethings versus the might of the Indian State.

After a little bit of sloganeering and singing after stepping out of the prison, Natasha and Devangana interacted with the media. Only a few TV channels interviewed them, the one with Rajdeep Sardesai stood out.

The 15 minutes they were on the screen told us a lot about them.

They were not the Angry Young Women they were expected to be.

They were laughing away.

They did not look bitter.

They didn’t shout threats.

They didn’t shout threats.

They didn’t preach.

One of them loves fish curry and didn’t get it the entire year.

Their demeanor was endearing.

They were anything but the terrorists they are made out to be by the Narendra Modi govt.

They were the girls next door.

Natasha and Devangana are the Deepti Navals of activism. 

That is why such interviews trouble the middle class. Most turn their faces away from the screen.  They don’t want to face the truth.

It could well be one of theirs tomorrow.

They got a taste during the farmer toolkit controversy when Disha Ravi was arrested for alleged sedition after she shared a tweet or what was it. Sedition, mind you, nothing less.

In our days college students would do a few uthak-baithaks in the police station if they were picked up for holding protests. Natasha and Devangana spent a year in jail and could face many more for doing that.

Kesavan Mamas, remember this when you go to sleep every night.

Why Sreedharan did what he did

Everyone knows James Bond throws the best party in town. It is one party I have been wanting to attend for years now. How frustrating it is to be the best spy in business and yet not get an invite to Bond’s dos. My sources say the MI-6 agent may throw the best parties but all is not well there. For instance, at the last party they didn’t put the right amount of vermouth in his martini. At another one, Kerala beef fry was undercooked, giving the dish a very bad name. If only I was there, nothing of this sort would have happened.

This is why I not just know Sreedharan’s pain but also feel it. 

The Metroman has been waiting for that elusive invite to the one party he always wanted to be in, to serve under the one man he considers a true leader. 

In the five-year buildup to 2014, Gujarat CM Narendra Modi had shown how a state is governed efficiently. You guys might question the claim today, but honestly most people bought it hook, line and sinker then. Modi was supposed to handpick meritorious people in his team. Many waited in vain for that phone call, probably Sreedharan did too. 

Over the next seven years, there might have been many instances Sreedharan expected a call from his leader. Take the inauguration of Kochi Metro for instance. Modi came, shared a few awkward moments with Pinarayi Vijayan, cut a few ribbons and went back. There was no ‘moment’ between Sreedharan and Modi as one would have expected. No planted stories in the media about how the PM sought out the nation builder seeking his advice. I don’t know about Sreedharan, but it was a rude shock to the Metroman’s fans like me. 

After all these years of snubs, Sreedharan probably decided to take matters into his own hands. With the help of the state unit of the BJP, he has gatecrashed into the party he longed to join. 

Political commentators have been very soft on him. They have tried to psycho-analyse Sreedharan. They have described him as the technocrat par excellence, who, like his tribesmen, is afflicted by tunnel vision and is unable to see the social trends around him.  This would have been true had he joined the BJP in 2014. But not today, after all those murders over food habits and disastrous policy decisions. 

His interviews show Sreedharan is not the outsider out to practise a new brand of politics. Sreedharan in fact is trying to prove he is as true a Sangh insider as anyone can be. 

There is no need to mollycoddle Sreedharan. It’s time journalists and commentators drop the kid gloves.

Only Rahul can stop Modi, but will he?

Even during my toughest missions in the remotest areas hunting down enemies, even when I am busy seducing or being seduced by pretty spies and operatives of all kinds, even when I am getting drunk on arrack and rum, even when I am experimenting with truth, half truths and innocent lies… I don’t take my eyes off my primary objective – that is world peace. But that is not the case with Rahul Gandhi.

Rahul is a nice chap. A handsome old young man with no known vices and quite a tharavadi. In short,  sundar and susheel. Qualities any parent would seek when looking for a match for their daughter.  Now the problem is he is not seeking a bride but looking for votes, enough of them to unseat Narendra Modi in 2024 or even 2028.

Nothing he has done till now gives his fans the confidence he will be able to do it.

Look at this. Rahul goes to Bihar where Tejashwi is working up huge crowds with his promise of 10 lakh govt jobs and what does he do? He starts talking about demonetization. Agreed note ban was a blunder of gigantic proportions, but people have moved on, and don’t seem to mind the trouble DeMo brought on them. 

For Rahul, somewhere the fight has become personal.

He probably hates the PM who has slapped cases against the entire Gandhi family and bad-mouths the dynasty starting from Jawaharlal Nehru. Naturally so.  But he was not out there seeking votes to settle a personal score.

He probably thinks 'how does that dumbo rule the country while I sit in the opposition', but then the BJP says Rahul is the dumbo, and unfortunately for Rahul, the voter seems to share that view.

To be a politician you have to have two necessary qualities. One, he or she must be a good communicator. Rahul is not. Two, he or she has to be a cunning backroom player. 

If the BJP can build a Hindu umbrella alliance, who is stopping the Congress from a forming a Brahmin-Dalit-Muslim tieup in let us say, Uttar Pradesh.

If BJP can split votes by fielding Asaduddin Owaisi, as the Congress claims, what is stopping the Congress doing something similar to the BJP.

Rahul is neither a communicator nor a cunning operator.

Like I have written in a post earlier, a Priyanka or a Rahul won’t win the elections for the Congress just because they are a Gandhi. We have moved on from the dynasty and it’s time the party and the family realized that.

I don’t know if Priyanka can revive the party, but from the 11 years we have seen of Rahul, we can safely conclude he can’t.

Every time he joins a protest or supports a cause, the BJP is able to dodge the bullet.

For example the current farmer protests have cornered the Narendra Modi govt and what stands out is Rahul’s absence.

Rahul Gandhi must focus on the objective.

If the aim is to remove Narendra Modi from the throne, then Rahul must abdicate and let someone else lead the Congress into the next election.

If the aim is to be the chocolate boy of Indian politics, he has won the title hands down. It’s time he let someone else take a shot at that title too.

Mandir Needs Modi More Than Modi Needs Mandir

Ten days ago, millions of Indians watched Prime Minister Narendra Modi preside over the bhumi pujan for the construction of the Ram mandir. The seating arrangement was a message in itself. The sants and spiritual leaders got a place in the audience, the RSS chief, UP governor and CM sat a few inches back forming a square. The pride of place was reserved for Modi. 

Modi that day was the king conducting ashwamedha.

His critics were appalled to see the absence of Advani and Murli Manohar Joshi, they were upset to see the line between the State and religion converge. They called Modi the publicity hunter who stole the whole occasion for his sole benefit – the man who won't share the limelight with anyone.

I differ.

If Modi wasn't there, there wouldn't be a show to talk of.

Do you think people will switch on TV to watch Mahant Nithya Gopal Das and Mohan Bhagwat, or for that matter Advani, do the puja? Nah.

Did you see any buildup to the bhumi pujan off the TV screens. Many RWAs asked people to light up diyas and celebrate Diwali in advance. I feared I would be blacklisted if I didn't do it. But to my surprise in an apartment complex of 1,000 flats, hardly 10 to 20 households celebrated Diwali that day.

Do you see anyone rushing to donate money to build the temple?

Do you see anyone quitting jobs to do kar seva in Ayodhya, though you may argue enough jobs will be lost to coronavirus pandemic and there will be enough jobless people do the honours when the time comes.

Even when the Supreme Court gave its verdict, gifting the land to Ram Lalla, viewers switched off television sets once the ruling was read out.

The mandir movement died long ago. To be precise: on December 6, 1992. Narasimha Rao, knowingly or unknowingly, finished the agitation. Once the Babri Masjid was gone, the Hindus didn't feel the emotional connect anymore. It didn't win anyone votes in all the elections that followed over three decades that even saw 10 years of Manmohan Singh rule.

Half of India's current population was born after 1992, says an Indian Express report. None of them saw the rath ratra or the riots it triggered.

The excitement about the mandir is limited to TV, with much of its audience above 40 – the generation that actually saw or took part in the movement. The rest are on Netflix or Amazon or YouTube or any of the hundreds of OTTs.

That is not to say Hindutva is dead. Hindutva is alive and kicking. It has metamorphosed into Moditva, which is essentially Hindutva raised to the power of two. Mandir is only a small subset. 

It is safe to say the mandir needs Modi more than Modi needs the mandir.

The Great Migrant March

What Modi is doing Manmohan couldn’t have done

Sometime when the the capital city was done with rioting, when the ruling party was plotting the fall of a state govt, when the country was busy wondering if the junior finance minister actually said goli maaro, an Opposition leader warned the novel coronavirus was heading India’s way and it wasn’t getting the respect it deserved.

That Opposition leader, you may find it hard to believe, was the Pappu of Indian politics - Rahul Gandhi. Now his fans are asking what if Rahul Gandhi was the PM and not Narendra Modi. Would India have been better prepared?

That is an unfair question to ask. We know what Modi’s performance is like but we don’t have any work by Rahul Gandhi that could be compared with Modi’s. When he could have become a minister and honed his skills under the best tutor he could possibly get, he refused. Instead he chose to wield the remote control to the govt even as he let his advisors remote control him.

Now one can argue, as I often do, it is better to have someone who does nothing than have someone who does demonetisation.

The valid comparison one can make though is between Manmohan Singh and Narendra Modi.

What if Manmohan was PM

We can safely assume Manmohan’s govt would have been prepared for the coronavirus crisis. We can expect that for many reasons. He has done it many times in the past, so he can sniff trouble when it comes. We would have had enough PPE kits, we would have mass produced ventilators, etc, etc.

Yes, there would be media plants on how Sonia Gandhi put her foot down, Rahul Gandhi put his best foot forward, how Digvijaya had his feet on the ground, while the sardar was always on the wrong foot.

In all that chaos, Manmohan would have ensured order, and seek no credit.

But we would still be unhappy. We Indians are like that. How many Indian victories we didn’t savour because Sachin Tendulkar scored a century and the match got over with a few overs to spare. Instead what we ask is why didn’t Tendulkar win that match we lost.

Now think of the present day. We didn’t plan for the novel coronavirus and we are where we are now. In such a situation Narendra Modi is the best PM India can have.

No other PM could have announced a lockdown at 4 hours’ notice.

No other PM could have asked citizens to bang their thalis and belans and katoris and made them do exactly that.

No other PM could have asked citizens to light lamps and candles and mobile flashlights and received total obedience.

In fact they did more than what Modi asked for. Like the old Hindi dialogue goes, Modi ne dil manga, hum jaan dene ko taiyaar hai.

No other PM could have made the Amit Shahs, the Ajit Dovals, the Rajnath Singhs of his govt fall in line so meekly. No hunt for headlines, no hunt for credit, it is all reserved for the Saheb.

No other PM will come out of the crisis unscathed and blemishless like Modi is going to do. The man is going to blame every failure on coronavirus - the failing economy, the social strife over citizenship law, the Kashmir distrust, the badly made dhoklas you get in Aggarwal’s mithai shop. You name it, it was all because of corona. And the countrymen believe it.

Some time last week, a message started spreading that we all have to stand in the balconies for 5 minutes to salute the PM. We were all getting ready to do exactly that -- some out of fear and some out of bhakti -- when a wise soul said it was a prank.

Good or bad, it is this unquestioned obedience to Modi that is going to save our lives in the pandemic, though many of us may not have a job to survive.

Jaan hai to jahaan hai.

JNU under attack

Faiz Ahmad Faiz haazir ho

Jasoos Narayanan Kutty has scooped the report of the investigation committee that probed whether Faiz’s poem Hum Dekhenge is anti-Hindu. Excerpts from the report are given below.

Translation of Faiz’s lines under investigation

From the House of God
Every idol will be removed
We, the pure, the faithful
Who were barred from His house
Will be made kings
Their crowns will be flung in the air
And thrones will be smashed
We shall bear witness

Critical analysis by investigation committee

From the House of God
Was it vaastu compliant?
Since the poem was written in Pakistan, chances are it didn’t follow any features prescribed by vaastu shastra for a healthy and meaningful life.

Every idol will be removed
What is the reference?
Is Faiz alluding to ordinary idols like Narendra Modi, Sachin Tendulkar, Shah Rukh Khan? The verse per se doesn’t elaborate. The poet has mischievously left it open-ended. He could well be referring to a ruler, but it can’t also be ruled out he might be referring to Ram or Durga for that matter.         

We, the pure, the faithful
Who are ‘we’?
Does ‘we’ indicate the people or believers of a particular faith?

Who were barred from His house
OK, someone closed a door on someone. That doesn’t mean we write a poem on that. Free speech my foot.

Will be made kings
Even harbouring such thoughts of becoming a monarch goes against the very foundation of our Constitution - that is democracy, equality, liberty. Totally not done.

Their crowns will be flung in the air
If their crowns are flung in the air, does it mean the new ruler will have to buy a new crown. If that is so, who pays for it? Wasteful expenditure, recommend a CAG audit of the poem.

And thrones will be smashed
Again totally unnecessary. If it’s a functional throne, why smash it? All this smells very fishy, like a scam in the making. Dal mein kuch kala hai.       

We shall bear witness
And do nothing? These people are material witness to destruction of public property and the poet is asking them to stay silent and - even more shameful - support the criminal act. That amounts to conspiracy and tampering with evidence. A notice should be issued to Faiz to recover the cost of crown and throne if and when they are thrown and smashed.

Conclusion
The police have not been able to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that the poem ‘Hum Dekhenge’ by Faiz Ahmed Faiz is against Hinduism, and by extension, India. But some logical reasoning by this committee has proved beyond reasonable doubt Faiz’s intentions were suspicious. There are many gaping holes in the poem which leave it to interpretation. The committee hereby decides to summon Faiz for questioning. It may be noted this is India, and the poet can’t plead the Fifth Amendment if he chooses to depose before the committee.

Five Reasons Why PM Modi's CAA Helps Economy

The popular perception is that the Narendra Modi govt has amended the citizenship law to keep illegal Muslim migrants out. This will polarise the society further and lead to more consolidation of Hindus, enabling a bigger victory in 2024. Abki baar, chaar so paar.

All that might be true, but that will only be a side effect. There must be a bigger picture, the jasoos in me thought. A visionary like Narendra Modi wouldn't do something that affects the lives of 135 crore people for a few handful of votes. Not unless it is in some way for the welfare of the 135 crore people.

This got me thinking. My week-long study of classified documents and interactions with the most powerful people who oil the wheels of the govt have led me to some startling revelations. Here is the gist of my research.

1. National security

India's security forces, especially the state police, hardly have any work or rather hardly do any work. Most are pot-bellied, though they would like us to believe it is some special muscle they have developed over the years by consuming high-protein diet that incidentally comes wrapped in fat. A little bit of action like a lathicharge will do them no harm. Many of them have no shooting practice. Mob violence gives the police a chance to practise what they learnt in the classrooms. Days or months after the protests die down, the Indian police force will be vastly improved and fighting fit.

2. Pakodanomics

The security angle is happenstance. More important is the effect these protests have on the economy. Everyone knows we are following the award winning economic theory called Pakodanomics. As has been explained in these pages earlier, pakodanomics has led to serious imbalance between supply and demand. Every economist on the planet agrees consumption is at the lowest in India in decades. What it means is we have too many people making pakodas and too few eating the pakodas that are getting made. The protests provide a unique opportunity for pakoda sellers, they are getting a ready-made market. Needless to say pakodas are selling like hot cakes in Shaheen Bagh, India Gate, Azad Maidan, Marine Drive, etc.

Consumption slump is a thing of the past, now please don't say we don't have enough supply. The govt can only solve one problem at a time.

3. Oil and gas 

Arvind Subramanian is a smart ass. He spent years as chief economic advisor to the finance minister but never made any public comment against any policy against demonetization. Instead he stayed under the radar collecting data for his research for the next 10 years. Economists like him point to the reduction in fuel consumption to prove there is a slowdown. That is not a big issue at all. Today I took 40 minutes to cover 3 km in my car. Imagine millions of cars stuck in traffic jams caused by anti-CAA protests. Fuel consumption jumps, oil firms profit, consumption all around. Everybody is a winner. 

4. Stimulus

The protests and the crackdown create a sort of stimulus for the economy. The pharma sector gets a big boost. Just imagine the business hospitals are doing now with all the injured flocking there. A bandage here, a surgery there sends the hospital cash registers ringing.

I admit the country's telecom sector is facing a serious crisis. A couple of companies may shut down,  a few thousand people may lose their jobs, but the govt is on the job. It will certainly find a way to use the protests to aid the ailing telcos.

You don't believe me, just look at the Sensex. It is above 41,000 points. They know their business. There can be no better proof.

Postscript: This is a study in progress. If you know Reason No. 5, please do share.

Anti-Citizenship Amendment Act Protests Escalate Across India

Citizenship Law Rewritten, Right to Equality Redefined

A Malayalee Hindu’s Confession on Citizenship Bill

The Citizenship Amendment Bill is now law. Many of my colleagues on twitter say they feel sad, scared, angry, disappointed. I feel no such emotion.

And why should I? It doesn’t affect me. I am a Hindu. I don't know why Muslims are upset. They are not losing citizenship or anything.

And these protests in the Northeast! To be honest, where is the Northeast? It seems somewhere back of the beyond. I have never been there. I don’t see the region becoming a job hub in the foreseeable future. If and when I go, it will be as a tourist. I will click a few photos to keep at home, a reminder of a good trip.

To be honest I don’t know how many states are there in the Northeast. That would be an exaggeration, there are Seven Sisters. Is Sikkim one of the sisters or a distant cousin or neither? I don’t know.

I learnt the capitals of the seven states to score marks in GK. That done, I readily forgot them the moment I passed out.   

I mean who cares about the Northeast? If it wasn’t for the blank cheque, err passport, for illegal Hindu immigrants and a babaji ka thullu, isn’t that what Kapil Sharma says, for illegal Muslim immigrants, we wouldn’t be wasting any airtime or ink on the Northeast.
You don’t believe me?

Manipur was blockaded for nearly 5 months - that is almost half the year - a couple of years ago. Did anyone notice it? Did anyone cover the news?

Irom Sharmila, a resident of Manipur, was on a hunger strike for 16 years demanding removal of AFSPA. Hardly anyone noticed. AFSPA is still in force in Manipur. Irom just gave up her fight and got married. Her wedding made more headlines than the fast. BTW, she also lost an election somewhere in between. It would be wrong to say nothing fruitful came out of Irom’s hunger strike. A few people wrote her biographies and she got the title ‘Iron Lady’.

This is how much we Indians care for the Northeast.

I don’t know much about CAB, but what I know is it was in the BJP’s manifesto and the party swept the Northeast. It means the people of the region want the law, right? I may be wrong, but I have already admitted I give a damn about the place.

That is not to say I am a heartless soul. I have deep affection for people and things Northeastern. Just like I relish Hyderabadi biryani and mutton kababs, I like momos and red chutney. They are good touchings for rum. Not to speak of the people. They make for wonderful drinking buddies.

Now you know why I don’t feel sad, scared, angry or disappointed over the citizenship bill.

Prime Minister Narendra Modi has mastered one trick. Us versus them. And this ‘us’ is always a lot more significant in numbers than the ‘them’.

At some point, the party’s gaze will turn to Kerala. It fits the bill. Small state. Sizeable Muslim population. Just 20 Lok Sabha seats which the party anyway doesn’t win. It could come in the form of a countrywide beef ban for example. Us versus them.

That is when I will feel sad, scared, angry, disappointed.

World Exclusive: Transcript of hacked WhatsApp chat out

Demonetisation of Bharat Ratna

Every time a Bharat Ratna is announced, the first thing a journalist does is look at the winner’s caste, religion, state, mother tongue, etc to decipher the logic behind the honour.

So when Pranab Mukherjee wins it, it is an outreach to Bengal, an insult to the Congress, which apparently didn’t do justice to his talent and a reward for visiting the RSS headquarters.

The ratna to Bhupen Hazarika is an outreach to the Northeast, the one to Sachin Tendulkar is to win the support of the youth, the honour for Lata Mangeshkar is well, how can anyone say no to Lata tai?

The point is Bharat Ratna has been devalued beyond repair. It is not anymore an award to honour builders of modern India.

So we have given Bharat Ratna to Lata Mangeshkar for singing songs, thousands of them. Her songs entertained us, no doubt.

Her songs made us happy or sad, philosophic or patriotic, depending on our varying moods. If she wasn’t there, Suman Kalyanpur would have done that, or someone else. May be Asha Bhonsle.

Sachin Tendulkar got a Bharat Ratna for scoring centuries, exactly 100 of them. He also entertained us. If he didn’t play cricket, we would have had some other cricketer as our icon.

The country honoured a few classical musicians as well. One of them apparently put pressure on the govt, another got it because he was senior and more accomplished than the earlier winner.
Now there is another fad.

My freedom fighter vs your freedom fighter. So we are looking up history books to confer awards on heroes of the independence movement.

After Madan Mohan Malviya, we will be giving one to Veer Savarkar soon. One day I hope one of my great grandfathers also gets one. A Bharat Ratna in the showcase is always a matter of pride.

Ask why Verghese Kurien and E Sreedharan haven’t got it yet. They are nation builders, not entertainers or freedom fighters. We are sticklers for standards.

BJP to honour Veer Savarkar with Bharat Ratna

Solution for Slowdown

Mission Kashmir: Modi Finishes What Nehru Started

Many years ago one of my distant relatives went in search of his father who had abandoned the family. He met him, but his father wasn’t willing to return. The young man kept travelling till he reached Nagaland, where he married a tribal woman and settled down. He returned to Kerala decades later, after his wife died. 

Such heart-warming stories are rare when it comes to Kashmir.

When the Narendra Modi govt scraps Article 370, the romantic in me who values democracy, liberalism, fairplay, virtue of fulfilling promises, etc gets edgy. But remove the romanticism, then as an average Indian, I feel nothing. No joy, no thrill, no excitement, no sadness, no grief. Nothing. Jammu and Kashmir seems so far away and distant.

There is a reason for that. Kashmiris never mingled with the mainstream. There is no dil ka ‘connection’ with Kashmir for the ordinary Indian. But he does hear stories of horror from the jawans who come back from the state, stories of how they are targeted by the locals in the Valley, how the Kashmiris abuse the rest of India. And of course those terrorist attacks.

No struggle for autonomy or freedom can be successful unless you earn people’s sympathy, especially the outside people. You cannot take arms and money from Pakistan and hope for sympathy from the rest of India.

Jammu and Kashmir is in India only because of Jawahar Lal Nehru. Sardar Patel would have let it go, Nehru hung on as it was the land of his forefathers. The wily politician that he was, India’s first PM sugarcoated the accession as people’s will, by enlisting the support of popular leader Sheikh Abdullah. The same Nehru later jailed Sheikh Abdullah.

Mission Kashmir was started by Nehru, but is being completed by Narendra Modi.

Indira Gandhi or Rajiv Gandhi or Narasimha Rao too would have been tempted to revoke Article 370 if they were PM today. That’s because geopolitics has changed. Today a bankrupt Pakistan will hesitate to bankroll a full-fledged terror campaign in India. In any case, after the WTC attack, terrorism is seen for what it is, not as a guerrilla warfare for freedom.

Today’s India is one of the World’s biggest markets. A market everyone from the US to China needs. To that extent, Modi government’s decision will not meet the kind of resistance Nehru would have faced in 1947.

Yes, there might be turmoil in Jammu and Kashmir, with a serious threat of it spilling over to other parts of the state.

The Modi would have factored in that risk and is ready to pay the cost. The BJP will certainly profit politically from the decision to scrap Article 370. The question is can India bear the cost? We have to wait and watch. 

Lok Sabha passes 30 Bills in 2 weeks